Harry Potter and the crazy authoress
by Noodle-Brained Kitsune
Summary: What happens when an authoress gets crazy ideas.A silly fic which is probably a notch below my standards...oh what the hell,it's funny.And dialouge.R/R!


Disclaimer:J.K owns them!Not me!  
  
  
  
One sleep deprived author + the Hogwarts gang during fifth year(see?I do NOT have a lolita complex!)+ funny-at-the-time-idea = Absolute chaos...and this dialouge fic!  
  
*portal pops over a rather nicely furnished room,several people shoot out.They being Harry,Hermione,Professor Trelawny,Ron,Draco,and...Lee!?*  
  
Harry:..where are we?  
  
Hermione:Well one minute we-  
  
Draco:Great,stuck with these people....  
  
Lee:Whoa,I'm not even in 2/3 of any of the books and I'm here!  
  
*a mutter of whoops and the portal drags Lee out,Professor Snape pops out instead and lands on his bum*  
  
Snape:@#*@#^&*@^!!!!!!!!!  
  
Harry:Never thought I'd hear a teacher say that....  
  
Ron:Oh noooooo...  
  
Trelawny:I sense a terrible cominggg.....  
  
Hermione:What is it Ron?You know Professor Trelawny is always wrong.  
  
Ron:Its....  
  
Draco:Come out with it weasel!!!  
  
Ron:...Another demented author dialouge fic!!!  
  
All:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  
  
*disembodied author voice*  
  
Disembodied author voice(DAV):Yeeeesss!And I can do anything I damn well pleaseeee!  
  
All:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  
  
DAV:And there's nothing you can do about it!  
  
All:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
DAV:Oh for heavens sake,take a breath before you all pass out!  
  
All:*gasp,hack,cough*  
  
DAV:Nooooww....I can have some fun!  
  
Draco:*silently pleading heavenwards,being that it seems every silly dialouge fic has Draco with leather pants *ohnoohno..not leather pants again...dear god no  
  
DAV:I'll pick on Draco first....being that he is my favorite character...  
  
All except Draco:O.o;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;  
  
Draco:They love me!They Really Love me!!  
  
DAV:But your still wearing the pants.  
  
Draco:So much for my ever joining the clergy...  
  
Ron:*mutters to Harry*If he's her favorite,why is she picking on him?  
  
DAV:Because,mere mortal,my least favorite characters in the bunch get worse.....much worseeee....MWUAHAHAHAH*hack,cough*HAHAHAH!!!!!  
  
*Everyone looks at each other pointing,well,mostly pointing at snape*  
  
DAV:Now,now...you'll find out soon.....until then...  
  
*the sound of snapping fingers is heard,and Draco is in those pants.Muwah.I am evil*  
  
Hermione:O.o now I can see why these fics always feature him with leather pants!Rrrrow!  
  
Ron and Harry:Hermione!!  
  
Trelawny:I predict he will beeee a hot item when he gets older....  
  
Draco:*blinks a bit and decides 'why waste this?'and struts around singing*I'm too sexy for my shirt,too sexy for my shirt  
  
*mob of fangirls appears*  
  
Snape:*drippingly sarcastic*Wow!Let's give a Sybill a round of applause for one  
of the few predictions of her's that might happen!  
  
Trelawny:Your just angry that I mis-predicted you winning the muggle lottery last  
month.  
  
*The two Professors argue*  
  
Draco:*dancing around amid fangirl catcalls*  
  
DAV:HEY!!!!!!!!!!!Back off girls!My fic!Get away!*sets several Lemures on the fangirls,making them scatter*Oh Damn....  
  
Draco:Damn,I was getting my groove on!  
  
DAV:Oh damn..  
  
All:Eh?  
  
DAV:The fangirls.That means I'm running out of ideas.When the fangirls come,thats bad.Better cut to the chase.  
  
All:YEAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!  
  
DAV:That could give me ideas you know.  
  
*utter silence*  
  
DAV:Oh damn,forget it...I have one more idea...  
  
*the snapping sound is heard and snape is suddenly in a flamboyant flamenco dancers outfit,with flaming flamingos and water fountains in the back ground*  
  
Snape:What....the...hell.....it.....THIS!?  
  
All:*burst out laughing*  
  
Harry and Ron:*laughing the loudest*  
  
Snape:Why you....ten point from Gyrffindor!  
  
Harry and Ron:*still continue*  
  
DAV:Points are null and void in here.  
  
Snape:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
DAV:In these fics.......no one can hear you scream.....oh dear..looks like time is up for now...  
  
All:*cheer*  
  
DAV:that is.....*evil grin*Until I get bored again.....MWUAAHAHHAHAHAH!!!BEWARE PART TWO!!!!  
  
*Everyone screams in terror as they are portaled out* 


End file.
